Sajini Chandrasekera

this is where I am at

To my daughter with love

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         Every mother's dream

I still remember the day you came into this world and how much joy you bought to the family. It was considered that a daughter born first in a family is lucky and how right that was. Luck was in this family from the day you were born and every little smile of you brought happiness to us. Day by day you grew up and we had our own disagreements and share of arguments and there were times in your teen years that you were stubborn. I think all mums go through this difficult period of their girls’ maturing and with better understanding, we both survived the storms.

Very soon you will turn a new leaf in your life and will enter yourself into the relation of marriage. Your dad and I are both happy that you have found your soul mate and felt equally strong about your feelings for each other. Marriage is a life time relation and never to be taken lightly. You both took a while to know each other but my darling there will be more that you don't know about each other and slowly take time to understand your spouse and his behavior once you start living under one roof. Marriage is not a learning process of short period and you will have life time to know each other every day as long as you are together.

It is very hard for me to except the fact that you are leaving me and dad but when I think that you are going to build your own nest, I’m happy for you. This new life will carry lot of new responsibilities on your shoulders and my dear it is just not him that's in your life but also his family and relations in your world. You have been a wonderful daughter to me and I want you to treat them as your own. Don't think that his mother is mother in law but treat her as your own mother and always respect her the way  you respected me.

    Most important, be utterly faithful to your husband. In this ever changing life style, temptations can be anywhere in any form. The foremost important foundation in marriage is trust and faithfulness  Be trustworthy and always trust your husbands’ implicitly so that none of the mischief makers can create any drama. Always be true to yourself and to your husband from this moment onward. You are for him and he is for you. Give him the same respect for what he is and as you also like to be respected.

I never believed in women liberation therefore the reality is that a woman has to be a woman and the man to be a man and both will get their respect and rightful places in home and in the  world. Only a woman can be a mother and wife.  Be ready to take over the dual role of wife and with time a mother. A wife is a unique character blend into one. She is a mother, a sister, a friend, a companion and a playmate and you will be all this to your husband.  Marriage is not a bed of roses and every marriage has its thorns, but if you use woman's strongest talent, which is intuition, wisely you will be able to overcome all hurdles.  Remember that intuition comes with patience, respect, trust and love.

Marriage is a bond between two different individuals so take time to learn about your partner mentally and physically. Learn the art of give and take with him. When doubt creep your mind and you want to relive your mind of confusion about anything then you must always have an open conversation with him and clear the doubts once and for all.

Don't ever be shy or embarrassed to enjoy the beauty of sex as it is the most beautiful thing between two people in love.

At last but not the least, any successful journey need commitment and strong will. It is a sacred bond between two people and two hearts and also two spirits. When the road gets bumpy don't give up but hang on and remember how you enjoyed the smooth ride when the road was smooth.  My years with your dad have been the most precious ones and I have enjoyed every moment of it and with you and your brother by my side. We had our joys and moments of tears but what matters most is we made the journey together.

So my daughter time has come for you to fly away from us to make your own nest and surround it with love, respect,trust and faithfulness. Whenever you want a shoulder to lean on or a hand to hold, both dad and I will be there for you.

Wish you joy and happiness and loads of love and blessings  for a new wedded life


posted by Sajini Lakshika Chandrasekera @ 1:08 PM,


At December 12, 2012 at 9:30 PM, Blogger Akhtar Janjua said...

Every child is a blessing of Allah but the first issue is something very special and a girl child at that. We too were blessed with a daughter as our first child and one can not agree more with what you wrote. They bring joy, luck and a sense of responsibility. All daughters are unique and our prayers for every daughter.

At December 19, 2012 at 12:28 AM, Blogger Kausar Bilal said...

Got touched to read this beautiful post. I feel yours and Pakistani cultures are pretty close. I simply loved the sensitivity and brilliance of the post.


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