Sajini Chandrasekera

this is where I am at

Fragrant Memories

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                                            Photo credits - Riaz Khan

As the dusky night rides down the sky with little diamonds glowing far away,with the silence embracing my heart while my mind was lost as I stared into the little perfume bottle tightly held in my hands. I can't remember how long I stared into this little bottle which had power to open my wounds, still ache deep and which was never healed. Every time I hold this, it reminds me of you.... your smiles, your laughter, your love and mostly you. I remember the day you gave me this perfume bottle with a kiss in my lips, and the sweet nectar of words you whispered  but I never knew that this gift will be such a precious memory of you, I never thought that my heart will ache one day by just holding it and I never thought that you would walk away leaving me alone in my own world. 

There was never a single day I lived without thinking of you and not a single night I kissed your lips and caressed your body in my dreams....not a single moment I forgot you and how you made me feel but today tears run down my cheeks as I behold this little bottle and the few drops of it remain in my hand. I have always loved the fragrance of this liquid and memories of your warm lips on my neck as you take its aroma into your nostrils deep, are still a vivid memory in heart. Ever since you departed from my world, I have used this fragrance only on special occasions as this perfume always reminds me that you are with me, unseen, unheard and untouched ......but deep within you are with and part of me and always be. 

You have embraced my life with endless perfumed thoughts and fragrant memories which I hold dearly to my self. You have enchanted my life with your love which I would cherish with memories of you. My heart is filled with little moments of you, moments I never can let go of .....just like this little bottle I hold dearly as it's precious to me as you are. I have struggle so hard to move on, but my aching heart still hold on to the past we shared  and this little gift will be by my side as your love, your warmth is still with this gift you gave me long ago..............

posted by Sajini Lakshika Chandrasekera @ 12:30 PM, ,

Silently for you

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I smiled ......My eyes have always wandered in search of you and after a long wait of patience my eyes found you and the joy I felt just being to be lost in your presence was more than I could put into words. My eyes froze with yours, as your lips curved a beautiful smile, while our hearts touched each other's silently. As you clasped your hand with mine, holding tight and whispering softly, it was the methodical  music of love I heard. Every word embraced with love, with eyes full of desire.
It was a beautiful time together, filled with smiles, laughs and memories. As I laid my head on your chest listening to the silent of your breaths, hearing the beating of your heart and feeling the softness of your fingers dancing on my hair. I closed my eyes to feel every single moment we are together and mostly to feel your love for me.
Love, we found was eternal as we are bonded with a soul relation and even with little arguments, misunderstandings, and long silences we have struggled through all obstacle to come this long short journey. I never knew that I could love you this much or my little heart can take all the love you give. You loved me with all my imperfections and all my curves and through the time we reaped a deep understanding, we matured our love in simple ways which made this bond even stronger.
To day as I look back the path we have come, I'm happy that we have become our strength and  encouragement from you is all I need to jump all the puddles and your love is my strength to face the hurdles without fear. There are so many things I want to say when I look in you, but I have saved all those words for you to understand silently.
Thank you my love for loving me and tolerating my madness with you, thank you for understanding me without judgment and mostly thank you for choosing me to share your life and I promise you to love even more than you ever loved me....... 

posted by Sajini Lakshika Chandrasekera @ 11:58 AM, ,

Me and you

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After a long time I heard your voice and the smiles made me think of the love I have for you. I believe we all have soul mates in life and sooner or later we cross our paths to experience a journey of love together.  Some times I have no words to express my feelings to you or words to express the depth of my love but I know many times the silence it self has made you feel every thing I ever wanted you to know. Its not always people find soul relations, where you can love from the deepest core of your heart with out lust and we together have proved that  purest of love exist in heart  and not in physical relations. Your voice still bring the melody to my ears and your laughter is the music of my heart. Your words still beat my heart and your love has engulf its beauty to every cell in my body.
I thank God that we have crossed our paths and making me finding the most amazing man to love. From the very first day I met you, I knew you were the one I searched for and being with you made me find my own self......You were my greatest strength and you were my weakness, you were my smiles and my tears and were all of me and I was all of you and together we were a one.
Love can't be searched for  only love will find you when the time is right and you entered my life when I was not looking and having you and making you part of my life has bought all the smiles I once lost...

posted by Sajini Lakshika Chandrasekera @ 12:19 PM, ,

If wishes came true

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I love no one but you, and you know that very well, but you are far away and I am here alone in my own little world. Then this is my life and maybe, however unlikely, I’ll find my way back to the place I once belonged, or maybe, one day, I’ll settle for what's meant to be.....

I still weeps for you late at night, when sleep does not come easily, when my pillow gets wet with the pouring rivers of my pain. It weeps for the one I miss. It weeps for the dreams on the tips of your fingers. It weeps for appointments missed and it weeps for the smiles we shared once. It weeps for the silence and it weeps for the noise. It weeps for the little love notes you wrote to me once, secret words were spoken as close to your ear as possible. It weeps for betrayal, intended or not. It weeps for the friends you once were. It weeps for the colors faded. It weeps for sunrise and it weeps for the glowing moon. It weeps for the long forgotten stolen moments and the unforgettable magical kisses. It weeps for who we were and who were are and for all the little memories that haunt day and night yet too far to embrace. It weeps for the last time you touched. It weeps for words that can never be taken back. It weeps so hard and so much and so often as  you carry on and It weeps for you. When you have run out of weeping you just remain a memory....A memory that I will be hold in deep in my heart, in a place unforgotten and sacred, some where deep where you will always remain untouched.  

Wish you were here. Wish I was there. Wish it was different. Wish wishes came true.
I'd wish you back.

posted by Sajini Lakshika Chandrasekera @ 11:23 AM, ,

Locked memories

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Memories, feelings and escapades of love and and all moments, beautifully wrapped in emotions of my love to you. A love very unique, a love very pure and a love that exist beyond norm. A stranger who just walked into my life has become, My Life and a world beyond you is unimaginably to me and though it's a long short journey and a blend of mixed heart felt emotions.

My eyes decent into empty space memorizing the way your eyes locked with mine, the smile that curved your lips and the power your heart had over me. How I loved that enchanting smile of yours which has its own magic to melt every bone of my soul. The warmth of your kisses still lingers where it awaken the deepest desires and your touch has caress all my painful wounds and my scars were healed with your love.

Endless of times I have wanted to reach back to be with you and to share all of me with you, to cuddle my self in your embrace and to explore the world together, to hold you at hard times and to encourage you at your weakest. Many times I wanted to get my self lost in your eyes which poured so much love, and shadow my self in your soul. I still yarn to be in your arms to feel your kisses on my forehead and magical touches on my naked skin. I still want to hold you for rest of my life as long as I can, to share all life's moment and watch the dusk till we both age in life........

posted by Sajini Lakshika Chandrasekera @ 11:28 AM, ,

Memories hurt

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I wonder why memories hurt so much when you are a shadow of my past......Every time I seek the sanctuary of loneliness, you slowly creep into my mind and take me down the memory lane where the smiles, laughter, pain and tears still painfully make their existence. These thoughts and these memories still have the power to wet my eyes and my heart flood with pain and misery. 

It's hard to forget the little details and the long moments we shared and even though time has passed and life has moved on, the wound is still deep and fresh, weeping for the past I lost and wanting the love, I yarn. I still feel the warmth of your eyes and the beauty of your smile, silently inviting me back to your loving embrace. I cuddle my pillow as I seek for you and tears never felt ashamed to flow down my cheeks as to remind that I still have not let you go and I still hang on for the love of my life. Every dream is a haunted memory of you and a pain I never over came with. I still feel the power of the magical kisses you shower me with and the sweet nectar of words you soothed my soul with and long stolen moments we silently embraced with. Day after day I live within these tortures  of your love and a never ending pain of a beautiful love I lost.  

posted by Sajini Lakshika Chandrasekera @ 1:02 PM, ,

Gifted love

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As my eyes flooded with tears, which bled from my heart, burning my cheeks with being helpless of my own self. It was a moment I needed you and your love and with out a single call you heard my pledge and answered my silent call. 

There's no where in the world I would feel safe, than in your arms and without a word you took me into your soul. You embraced me with all your love and caress me with your soothing words. Wiping my hot downpour of tears with the gentle strokes of your finger tips making my feelings console in your presence. 

Your kisses on my forehead, with words of strength  you gently whispered, led me to the path of recovery. You let me tears run as I wanted, but held me strong in your love making me believe in my own strength. 

It is not always we are gifted with such love and you are a gift from above to help me to be who I am. Entering you into my life have bought so much joy but above all you have touched all the simple corners of my life in a profound way that I never knew even existed. 

posted by Sajini Lakshika Chandrasekera @ 12:06 PM, ,

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