Beyond silence
Tuesday, July 23, 2013
As I was looking out of the window into the gloomy skies and my thoughts suddenly crossed it's barriers and swam thousand hours of my past...our past. You were the most beautiful woman I ever laid my eyes on and the only woman I ever wanted. Life was not perfect , but with you beside me I gained strength to jump all hurdles of life. Your love, your words, your blessings was all I ever needed and with you I thought all impossibilities was just a step away of making possibility but it took very little time to change every thing around me.
Every day you changed into a person I never knew. Your demands were more than I can fulfill and your words became harsh and you became a stranger in my life. It's true I wanted to give you every thing you needed but I needed time for that and I understood why you are acting strange but just wished you understood me as well. Every minute, I worked hard not for my self but for you, to make your life more comfortable and you happy but you didn't have patience to wait till I succeeded. You didn't slow down with me or wanted to be with me. Your every word hurted me deeply and your actions became unbearable and finally one morning you left. It was the most hardest day of my life and to see the woman I loved so much just walked away without even looking back. If only you know how I cried for you, how I lost my self and how painful it was. For months I was where you left me and it took a long time to recover my self from the coma of you but slowly I gained courage to face the world and step by step I built my self. It was a hard journey and many times I stumbled down and wished you were there to hold me but you existed only in my dreams.
Silently years have gone by and I have reached success which was once a dream to achieve and today I have every thing around me except you and I have become mature enough to forgive you and let my past be behind closed doors. I have understood the only thing I can do now is to pray for you and let you go from my memories. Time has healed my wounds and the scars do remain but I'm strong enough to let go of the memories which haunted me for long. I have learnt that who walked away in the dark should be forgotten in the light and as I have reached the heights of life beyond silence and some times we let go of someone we really love… not because we want them to be happy but because it’s much painful for us to see them how much they want to go.
The things I have learnt about life is that we all get hurt at some point. We all have emotional nights and cry our self to sleep for hours. You are going to suffer some kind of heart break and some kind of a loss, but you will also have to those moments where you heal and to me those moments were the best. After every thing I went through I smiled as I smiled for the first time again. I felt I was alive again and life has just restarted and this what made who I am beyond silence.
posted by Sajini Lakshika Chandrasekera @ 12:37 PM,
2 Comments:
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At July 23, 2013 at 1:47 PM,
S A J Shirazi said...
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Very good post after "ages." Ya, you always get out better.
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At March 1, 2014 at 7:10 PM,
said...
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Just loved the line "I have learnt that who walked away in the dark should be forgotten in the light ".....awesome expressions and feelings...loved the
way u break the silence.......really touched.....
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