Sajini Chandrasekera

this is where I am at

You promised

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You promised to be with me till the end ....You promised to be my strength at hard times ...You promised to love me till death .....YOU PROMISED ...

I trusted all your words and clinged to all your promises . I gave you my heart which was kept locked . I wanted you to protect it as it was part of you . But , you were selfish to hurt me and use me and when i demanded my heart back , you kept squeezing it till it hurt and pain was covered in tears . What happened to that promise of yours ? What happened for me being the only one in your life ?



The moment she entered your life as a friend you turn your back on me , leaving me to bleed with tears and pain. I kept on asking why you had to end this way , why you became so cruel to me but i'll never find answers to all my questions which is unheard .What did i do to make you so unhappy for you to turn your back on me ? I forgot all norms and loved you unconditionally . I gave you every thing my heart could give and i didn't let anything stand between us . I did every thing to make you happy and some times i sacrificed my happiness to put a smile on your face . I thought you loved me the same way i loved you and how wrong i was .....

Time has passed but the wound you gave me is still in my heart . It will never will be healed and every single memory still haunts my mind . I loved you with every corner of my heart and soul and will probably never let you go , but all i can do now is to bury you in the deep dark corners of my heart as i know it will be safe there . I was never enough of your love and no matter what i needed you with me every single minute .

But it was never enough for you . You kept asking more and more ....every thing i gave and felt was not enough to make you complete. I keep asking my self what else i could have done and these feelings and thoughts piled with unanswered questions still haunt my mind day and night . I want these feelings to go away and i want to be free from your memory but will i ever be ?

When i felt that i cannot hang on to you i finally let you go but the memories of our togetherness still wander through my mind . I'm still confuse , why was i not enough but it will remain unanswered for ever . All i ask is teach me how to forget and move on like you did ? To leave that beautiful memory behind .....I can't forget you and i never will, i'm only trying to lock that part of my life that it will not disturbed me again .

What happened to your promise ...what about forever in life .....you asked me not to hurt you coz your heart was with me , but ......you hurted me , you made me cry , you made me paralyzed and finally left my side .....

posted by Sajini Lakshika Chandrasekera @ 9:52 AM,

9 Comments:

At September 11, 2012 at 11:16 AM, Anonymous Power Angel said...

Beautifully written and very touching . I went through this night mare some time ago and still those memories haunt . It was not easy to let go of some one you loved but time is the best medicine ...

 
At September 11, 2012 at 6:15 PM, Blogger Deb Sistrunk said...

Wow. Powerful words!

 
At September 11, 2012 at 10:48 PM, Anonymous Kausar Bilal said...

Nice expression and very true story...I always heard that at least in our society, love is always a man's call game. At one time a women is good enough for him, but at the any other moment she is nothing and doesn't 'worth him.'Although these are the rules of the games but truly hurting for a person who can't forget someone for so long and finding herself not good enough for anyone else again.

 
At September 12, 2012 at 9:41 AM, Anonymous Krishan Perera said...

Beautifully done with feelings of a lost love. Not just women but men also feel the same amount of pain and would like you to write on men behalf as well.

 
At September 13, 2012 at 10:18 AM, Blogger Sajini Chandrasekera said...

@ Power Angel ....
Thank you for your comment . Letting go of some one you loved is hard but once you realize that it's you who suffer , you slowly begin to find your way back to happiness.

 
At September 13, 2012 at 10:18 AM, Blogger Sajini Chandrasekera said...

@ Deb sistrunk...
Thank you for your wonderful words , much appreciated .

 
At September 13, 2012 at 10:23 AM, Blogger Sajini Chandrasekera said...

@ Kausar Bilal .....
Thank you for your wonderful comment . i think it is Asian women who go through this as they are still not much exposed to the world and the up bringing of a girl in this society make her naive. In this part of world man play a vital role and women are still used to satisfy their desire and once they are tired of a girl /woman they simply search for another .

 
At September 13, 2012 at 10:34 AM, Blogger Sajini Chandrasekera said...

@ Krishan Perera...
Thank you for your comment. Lost love is very painful and i think both men and women feel it equally. I will try to write on behalf of them as well :-)

 
At March 4, 2014 at 7:45 PM, Anonymous Jayanti Mistry said...

If Partner Betrayed you , when you love your partner so so much, And what happens to your mind body and heart and the feelings.. You expressed so so beautifully . Just for a moment while reading one gets involved so deep in heart. I love your way of writing is so beautiful your involvement is so much and as result you write so lovely article . I am so so happy to read It

 

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